1 post tagged “hugh hefner tsol brace girls next door dreams myeloma”
Hef and I
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Crap, as if I didn't have enough to worry about this week I wet my bed a little bit last night. It wasn't bad just a tiny spot when I got up but I was still angry at myself. I have never had a problem with this the whole time I have been injured except once when the nurse took 45 minutes to answer my call light. Tonight I actually trotted to the bathroom without my brace. I did need to change my sheets anyways so.......I guess it was time.
Trotting or in reality walking carefully in the dark to the bathroom was oddly liberating. My core muscles hurt and there was a pain in my lower back but nothing terrible. At least my spine didn't snap.
This whole thing must be from mixing new nerve meds, the new dosage of pain meds, and an anti anxiety med. All I wanted to do was fall asleep in my bed for a full five hours. Lately this has been impossible because I haven't had effective pain management. The doc said this would be okay do to mix and match for this purpose and I asked the pharmacist who seemed to think this wouldn't kill me.
One of the most frightening things I have discussed with my doctor on Thursday is that there may be other nerves that might be affected by what is going on in my hip area. The nerves that take care of bowl and bladder are opposite those that affect my hip. All of these nerves may be irritated from the injury. The nerve sheath/protective coating might still be swollen from trying to protect my nerves when I had surgery and subsequently when I had radiation. Nerves take a significant time to heal. From what I read sometimes things don't go back to normal for a year. Sometimes they don't go back to normal at all depending on what type of damage has occurred. The doctor hasn't mentioned damage yet but he also has not said to rule this out. He went over my x-rays with me and took time to talk to me about it. Thank goodness I took A & P in college so I can look at a diagram and understand what these he is talking about some of the time.
It's still very difficult to get my body back on a regular schedule for anything including sleeping, eating, exercise, and of course, elimination. I have tried but I am only two weeks out from my radiation that I am not sure I have given myself a chance to adjust. This is why I am make a terrible sick person because I do not allow for any kind of downtime for my body to heal.
Most days I have been sleeping in my chair. Tonight when a friend came over to talk to me I was asleep for part of it. This has happened twice when I have had people over. I have also done it to Tegan and Bonnie in the car. I just fall asleep hard in the middle of a conversation and I don't wake up. I can't complete sentences or keep up with the conversation. I feel like such a failure about that but what am I to do about this? My body needs sleep, it's decided to screw with me and put me back on my effective vampire sleeping schedule where I twilight sleep through the day and then not want to sleep at night despite meds.
I did try to sleep last night and this is how it went. My dream was that I was a paparazzi and I had to get certain photos of arms dealers and show them to Hugh Hefner so he could identify them. I managed to upload the pictures on time and save the world but the bad guys were after me and I had to pee so bad and this is when I woke up, got out of bed and scooted to the bathroom as quick as I could. The Hugh Hefner part of this dream tells me I have to stop watching so much of "The Girls Next Door"
For my reader who don't watch much television, "The Girls Next Door" is a delightful reality television series that focuses on the lives of the three young women who are Hugh Hefner's 'girlfriends'. The show chronicles what goes on at the Playboy mansion on a day to day basis. I actually enjoy watching this show because I have always admired Hugh Hefner because he is a major contributor to the ACLU, Planned Parenthood, and other organizations that help women. I believe that part of my grad school scholarship was underwritten by some money he donated to a woman in broadcasting organization. Hef is also responsible for saving the 'Hollywood' sign. I have no idea why I know that. He is somewhat of a maverick that has chosen to live a unique lifestyle and I applaud him for that. Say what you want about him making money off the backs of naked women but a Playboy shoot is a heck of a safer place for a young woman to be than some workplaces or bars I've visited.
I was surprised that I enjoyed watching the day to day routines of his three 'girlfriends' Holly, Bridget and Kendra. Holly's dream is to be a producer/art director of photo shoots so she spends her days interning at the Playboy Photo Studios. Bridget wants to be a television presenter of some kind so she works as a special reporter for EXTRA! and takes lessons to help with that. She is also interested in Renaissance Fairs and the Paranormal so she should be a pinup girl for geeks. I am not sure what Kendra is focusing on at the moment but she seems interested in developing a rap career from her participation in another reality selection on MTV this fall, Celebrity Rap Superstar.
I enjoy all the behind scenes planning of the major events and seeing the reaction of all of the girl's parents when they visit the mansion. Another favorite is watching the current trio's reaction when an old girlfriend comes to visit. The E! Network does a good job of presenting the Playboy Company as a 'family' atmosphere. It's hard to believe that Hef is 81 and still going strong. Viva La Hef and may I be at least that coherent when I am his age. The way things are going I am not so sure.
